You Know My Game – Part 4: Casino Alone

Previously on You Know My Game; I was taught a very cruel lesson in losing, and was lucky to make it out of the casino with £20 and just 3 hours in which to reach my goal of £300 to pay for a Nintendo 3DS.

First of all, I should apologise for the lack of updates. I have been rather busy doing other projects such as The Martin Kilbane Show. (What, you don’t know what The Martin Kilbane Show is? It’s a comedy sketch podcast which I have made. Go here and check it out.) Of course, that means that there was a bit of a gap while I was working on that for You Know My Game. The next few entries are based on events that happened a few months ago now, so allow me to continue.

After the loss, I took a few weeks off from going to the casino. I needed to clear my head and forget the bad luck that I had last time. I assessed my goals once more. I had to win £300, but now in just 3 hours. Whereas before, with 5 hours originally set, it worked out to be around £60 per hour. Now, with the reduced time, it works out as £100 per hour. This is a large amount. Truth be told, I doubted if this was possible.

I marched back into the casino, head held high. I wanted to look unphased, whereas on the inside, I was still hurting. I looked around at the action going on. It was a slow day, I must have come in at a bad time. I would say that there wasn’t more than 30 people in the room, and only a dozen were at the Roulette tables. I walked around the tables, looking at the results, seeing whether they were being unkind or generous. This didn’t help as I couldn’t really ascertain any general verdict over any of the particular tables. I then saw a croupier all alone at a different Roulette table. I went over to ask her if she was working, as she may had been a relief croupier to one of the tables which was more active. Sure enough, she confirmed the table is open. I felt bad. No one was playing at her table. I thought she might like my company or indeed a bit of activity to do. Admittedly, the croupier being an attractive blonde in her twenties did help me make my decision on whether or not to play here or go to a more busier table.

I put my £20 on the table, asked for £5 chips, and began the game once more. This was to be the weirdest game of Roulette I had ever played. Being the only player at the table, the croupier didn’t really bother with the time limits as used in a normal –and busier- table, which is a good job really. Can you imagine being the only player at a table, placing your bets, then waiting patiently, in silence, for about 3 minutes, till the croupier declares “No more bets, please” and starting off the wheel. It would have been agonising.

So, she set the wheel spinning. I was once more playing dozens, choosing to bet £5 on the low and middle dozens, as that is what the previous results had favoured. Of course, I don’t actually know exactly when these results were accrued. They could have been there from 11am in the morning for all I knew. Luckily, the wheel liked me, and I was up £5 already. The croupier declared “Table is now open” and I once again put my bets on the low and middle dozens. She decided to wait about 30 seconds, to see if anyone else would play too. Now that I was playing, maybe I could attract some other players to the table. I rather think some kind of magnet would have had better luck at attracting something to the table, than I did. I tried to make some small talk, something to maybe start a conversation off with her. I chose generic conversational statement number 5; “Wow, it’s quiet in here today, isn’t it.” She responded “Yes, it is.” Having answered the question she closed the table to bets, and set the wheel off once more. Red 7 came up. I was up again.

Now, I had £30. I formulated a strategy. Stick to low bets until you get to £40. Then stick £10 bet on each of the dozens. The croupier reopened the table, and I once again placed my bet. I attempted generic conversational question number 2. “How long have you been working today?” The croupier replied, “Not long.” Informative. I decided then to shut up. I could tell she wasn’t in the mood to talk. I then thought more; maybe she really wanted to be alone after all. I had came over here and played as I thought she looked lonely and a little bored. Maybe she actually liked it like that, and now, as I am playing, I am forcing her to do work. This was bad. Then the result of the latest bet came in. Black 33. This was bad.

I thought about taking my chips and going to another table, but reconsidered. Would that be rude? Normally, a table is busy, so if one man goes to join another, it’s not really noticeable. I think the croupier would notice this time though, if I left her table and went to another one that was busier. And what would she think if I did that? Would she think I was a bit weird, or that she had offended me in some way. I couldn’t let her think that. I decided to stay. Then I realised, I had forgotten about one of my strategies.

This is what roulette should be like. I don't mean the croupier in the bunny costume of course.

One of my strategies is that when I lose, take a time out. This is because, we are currently betting based on the previous results, with the mindset that it gives us an idea where to place our next bet. This is entirely pointless, as the ball does not hold a memory, therefore the chances of the next result are exactly the same as the chances of the time before or after the current result. The reason why I do it though, is because it gives me a method. Order amongst chaos. This time round though, I couldn’t sit out. I was the only person playing at the table. The croupier span the wheel when there are players to play. I couldn’t ask her to spin the wheel a few times without me playing, as there would be no point and no profit in it. I was stuck. I had to gamble. Take a guess.

I decided to change in favour of the new result. So, I played £5 bets on middle and high dozens. I waited, in silence, patiently. Once more, the wheel was set in motion. Red 1. Ouch. I was down to £10. I decided to place my bets on low and high dozens. I placed each chip down in the relative boxes, hoping that these weren’t my last bets. Luckily, they weren’t. Red 9, which gave me a bit of hope and £5. Sticking with the same bets as before, I sat nervously in my seat, so glad that the time limits were reduced. It would have been terrible to wait longer than I had to. Red 27 came up. I was back to £20.

I took my winnings and stood from my chair. I had had enough for today. I wasn’t getting anywhere and didn’t want to trouble the croupier anymore, so I left to get my chips cashed and headed home. Still on £20 and now, down to 2 hours to get my goal. Today, I learned something. Never bet on a table with no other players, regardless of how attractive the croupier is.

Don’t forget, although this whole venture is entertaining, I do it fully aware of the risks and repercussions of the exercise. Gambling can become a serious addiction and should not be treated lightly. If you intend to gamble, please use caution at all times. If you are worried and think you may have a gambling problem, please click on this webpage for help and more information.


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